She took a pen and began to write a new list, not of things to trade but of things she would never say again. She wrote her brother's name and then struck it out
Parasited.22.10.17.Agatha.Vega.The.Attic.XXX.10...
It arrived in the morning like a draft, as if the house had exhaled syllables through the cracks. Written on the underside of the attic floorboard in pencil—small, careful strokes that only made sense when she lowered herself into the light—were the words: parasited.22.10.17. Parasited.22.10.17.Agatha.Vega.The.Attic.XXX.10...
Agatha considered the cost. To never name again: to forget and forbid herself the vocabulary of a person who had once mattered. It would be a violence against memory, a lobotomy of the tongue. But in the ledger's terms, it would be payment.
Agatha thought of passing a life across a table as if it were a set of china. She thought of the ledger bleached white with nothing written upon it. For the first time since the attic claimed her, she wanted a thing: not knowledge, not returns, but a silence that could be purchased. She took a pen and began to write
She hired a cleaner who smelled of lavender and spoke of moving abroad. He found nothing but dust and a coin she didn't remember having. The coin was warm. The cleaner swore, then apologised; he left, though not before glancing at the attic hatch with a face like a man remembering an animal bite.
"What would I pay?" she asked, though she could feel the terms aligning like teeth. Written on the underside of the attic floorboard
Agatha learned to hide small things in the folds of time: a child's drawing in a book, a confession tucked into a sock drawer, a photograph behind the heating register. The attic read them like braille and liked them more. Once, in a fit of spite, she left nothing for a week—no lists, no names, no trades. The house sulked. The taps ran at three in the morning, pouring cold water into the sink until the kettle overflowed. Her dreams became transparent, populated by the faces of strangers who asked her for directions in languages she did not speak.